The Right Way to Ask a Potential Leader to Join You

By Darryl Wilson

the original blog post is here @

NeededWHY IS THIS IMPORTANT? Too often the right people say “no” to us and to God when we enlist them. Sometimes it is our fault. How can we avoid this?

WHAT DO I DO? First, make sure you have prayed (Matthew 9:38) and observed them before asking them. When you are sure this is the one God desires to join you, then ask them this way:

  • set up a face-to-face meeting that won’t be rushed,
  • tell the potential leader you have been praying for someone to help you with ____ and why ____ is important,
  • tell the leader that God has brought him/her to your mind and as a result you began watching what God was up to in his/her life (give examples of what was observed),
  • tell the leader that because what you had observed confirmed that they were the right one, you began spending more time with them (in life and class ministry–remind them of some shared experiences),
  • tell the leader that you are convinced that he/she is the right leader to help you and the class, and
  • ask the leader to pray for up to a week about joining you in this work (set up a time to get back together for an answer).

In my experience, many good leaders will give excuses for not serving if we do not pray and give them evidence of how God is at work in them. Help leaders say “yes” to God by praying, observing, and spending time together before enlisting them.


WilsonDarrylInformal407Darryl has served as Director of the Sunday School Department for the Kentucky Baptist Convention since 1997. Prior to that, he served as Minister of Education in a church in South Carolina and four in Kentucky. He is the author of The Sunday School Revolutionary!, a blog about life-changing Sunday School and small groups. Follow Darryl on Twitter, Facebook, and his blog,